childcare

i am married for a year to a lovely girl ,we are living in south africa ,my wife has a son ,she was married before
village wedding no paperwork. The idea was that we spend the next few years in SA and then move t thailand,but she is missing her son to much and wants to bring him to south africa.my question is how difficult will that be ,i am sure the father will object ,he does not support the child and sees him once or twice a year.what are the difficulties i am going to encounter, I am sure many of you have been this route before,Your advice will be most welcome.

Shouldn't be a major problem(what visa is she on..?) i know girls that have done this...the only obstacle i would think would be the 'father'....but...$$$$$.

It really depends on the father,as the general attitude is to not let the child leave the country without the fathers permission,especially hard if the son has the fathers last name!We went through the change to the wife having sole custody ,as the father is not available and changed the child to a different house book from the fathers family house book,got her a passport in Bangkok!

We heard of children being refused exit at the airport w/o the fathers permission when the childs name is different than the mothers(depends on the immigration official they encounter)!We never did make a trip to the USA,but the daughters passport expires in a few months and we went to Khon Kaen to get a new one and we were refused/ because they wanted the fathers permission even though we have sole custody!

So ,you see,it can get very involved,depending on what authority figure you deal with!My suggestion is that if you can make contact with the father,you may be able to ''buy'' his cooperation if he won't cooperate voluntarily.I would have it done by a recommended attorney!Good Luck~

Everybody is different. Having said that, it may be that if your wife pays the boy's father, he will let the boy go. If he knows that a farang is in the picture, that may increase the price, but perhaps that is not an issue when it comes to your wife's happiness.

Good luck to all three of you & take care.

Having been in similar circumstances in my previous Thai marriage.Husband wanted big money, wife went to village head man who certified she has been the sole supporter of her child for a number of years. With this she changed kids surname to hers, got passport, then subsequently a visa to UK.Gave him a bottle of whiskey. Hope this will apply to you. Good Luck.

trubrit wrote:Having been in similar circumstances in my previous Thai marriage.Husband wanted big money, wife went to village head man who certified she has been the sole supporter of her child for a number of years. With this she changed kids surname to hers, got passport, then subsequently a visa to UK.Gave him a bottle of whiskey. Hope this will apply to you. Good Luck.

About the same process as what we did with the exception of the name change.Since we were married legally,my wife has my last name,I wonder if she would have been able to change the daughters name to be the same as ours and what she had to do to change the daughters last name to a name that is different from the last name on her birth cert.?

I think this is going to give me more grey hair than i already have,my wife had her child in her name
but at some stage changed to the fathers name he sends cash off and on and does not often see the child ,Yes I see them trying to make some cash out of this thing ,my wife agreed that we will stay in SA and that he would get a start to learn to read and write thai and in two years time we will bring him out but everything changes she wants him out here soon,I have asked her to contact the ampore and her husbands parents , to get the ball rolling,and see what gives.she says she cannot stay here without the child,so i can see trouble on the horrizon ,but thats life will let you all know what happens

At least he sends some cash, the best thing for the child would be to stay with its mother (as father is not around) and if you is staying in SA get an education there that would be a real headstart, you can't blame her for wanting to be with her child at least you did plan for it originally sure it will workout well and the exchanging of baht won't be too much probably less than you think.