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Imported Husbands

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Imported Husbands

Postby UdonExpat » September 25, 2010, 7:19 am

Once again Seth Mydans is writing about Udon. Somethings are a bit of a stretch, but undoubtedly the import/export marriage business is alive and well in Udon.

I'm sure my wife didn't pay any import tax on me, although the family tried to impose the VAT when we married, but I claimed and got a refund.


A Thai Region Where Husbands Are Imported
By SETH MYDANS
Published: September 24, 2010

UDON, THAILAND — The most dazzling creatures Nui Davis saw when she was a child were the village girls who had found foreign husbands, visiting in their Western finery and handing out candies to the children.

“For me, they were like a princess,” she said. “And I kept those pictures in my mind, and I made a wish that one day I would like to be one of those ladies.”

Today, at the age of 30, she lives with her husband, Joseph Davis of Fresno, California, in an air-conditioned, three-bedroom house with a driveway and basketball hoop, surrounded by flower beds and a well-kept lawn.

“My family keeps saying, ‘You got it. You got your dream now,”’ she said.

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/09/25/world ... ss&emc=rss
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Re: Imported Husbands

Postby trubrit » September 25, 2010, 8:57 am

Oh my God . Thats where I have been going wrong . I haven't got a basket ball hoop . Is that for hubbie to jump through? :lol:
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Re: Imported Husbands

Postby nkstan » September 25, 2010, 9:50 am

:lol: Very simplistic aricle to an expat that is living here,but probably interesting to those back in Falangland!
A couple of real inaccurate suppositons though,IMO!50% ending in divorce?I don't think they can back that one up,not to forget that the USA has about a 50% divorce rate,highest in the World!And just because we choose to live here,doesn't mean we were imported for marriage!
Plus there was a statement that the ''majority '' of Thai women were interested in falang husbands,which is pure BS!!
The majority of Thai women marrying falangs are relatively economicly insecure,never the less,the majority of them and all other Thai women would prefer a Thai husband of means and the more comfortable lifestyle of Thai community living and acceptance!
Although the women marrying a Falang may have a higher living standard than most of her class,she sacrifices alot of community in order to gain it!
And many with children from previous relationships have no other alternative for a ''husband''!
Of particular note from the article was the Thai lady married to a Thai man and her comment regarding being married to a falang!
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Re: Imported Husbands

Postby BobHelm » September 25, 2010, 10:05 am

Some good points Stan, especially about the 'home' divorce rate. If the USA has the worst, then I don't think the UK is lagging far behind.
Thanks for the initial link UdonExpat & for one of the best Topic titles I have seen in a very long time. :D
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Re: Imported Husbands

Postby parrot » September 25, 2010, 10:37 am

I was in the Air Force when I got married. Part of the requirements was to have a chaplain interview both me and my wife-to-be. This guy said he had been studying mixed marriages between GIs and oriental women for a number of years....he proceeded to ask me about 10 questions while my wife was out of the room, then her the same 10 while I was out. Then he called us both back in......and proudly pronounced: "based on my studies and based on your answers, I give a marriage between the two of you a 95% chance of failure in the first year." Well, wasn't that special?! He signed off my checklist, we proceeded to get married, and we still toast him each anniversary, as we have for the past 37 years. I'll always remember him not as a priest, but as an a-hole.
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Re: Imported Husbands

Postby Tafia » September 25, 2010, 10:53 am

Where is “Foreign Son-in-Law Street.”?? not a name I'm familiar with.
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Re: Imported Husbands

Postby Moothon » September 25, 2010, 10:55 am

Not this crap again. Every straight female in every country in every corner of the world has a dream of marrying a dependable, kind, loving, financially secure man. Even though more couples in America just "live together" now as more men understand how bad a divorce can affect the rest of their lives, the US still has the highest divorce rate on the planet.
My wife is from Udon from normal family, finished University, now works in a bank, and could have picked most any guy she wanted, Thai or foreigner. THE FACTS ARE, SHE SAID TOO MANY THAI MEN, MOST THAT CAN AFFORD ONE, HAVE A MIA NOI,(SECOND MINOR WIFE) AND SHE DIDN'T WANT TO LIVE LIKE THAT. And, that women who's husbands do this will outright deny it and turn a blind eye to it, while many will accept it and treat the mia noi like a slave.
I have nothing good/bad to say about American women, because of just that, some are good and some bad, JUST LIKE THAI WOMEN! It just really pisses me off when 100% jealous people try to rain on others parades!!!!!! Tam dee dai dee, tam chua dai chua !
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Re: Imported Husbands

Postby thrilled » September 25, 2010, 9:22 pm

I know for A fact the divorce rate in the us and uk is far higher than 50%.Maybe it was that in the 1970's maybe.But 2010 I would say it is more like 60some% if not more,probably more like 70%.
If I was A thai woman,I would shop for A farang.I mean ya have to be realalistic.
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Re: Imported Husbands

Postby Seahawk » September 25, 2010, 10:24 pm

Really interesting thread. Of course Thai Girls want security, especially those who already have a child/children. These girls will find it very difficult (if not impossible) to find a Thai Man of substance who would, along with his family, welcome "tainted goods". Are there girls out there who are loving and true ? I believe yes....call me naive if you wish.....but in my experience there are good and bad. I have experienced both in my time in LOS. However, because of my failings as a man and my misplaced pre-conceived ideas of manipulative Thai Women, I have screwed up more than one relationship. Maybe I'm wrong, but IMHO there is possibly a better chance of a success of a long standing relationship with a Farang and Thai than there is back in the UK or USA with Farang and Farang.
As for Thai girls who do not have children....and she still wants to be with a Farang.....I for one would always try to be non-judgemental. Maybe just maybe, long and loving relationships can work.
Granted there are sad and all too often tragic reports of Thai/Farang relationships.....we all have either been in one or two or know of. But surely that is true the world over. I'm not trying to be too simplistic (relationships never are) but why are we here? Love is the real answer. Wanting to love and be loved in return.
A pipe dream? I think not. There are enough members of this forum who can give many a happy ending.......and although as yet I am not in that happy position, one can always live in hope and look to the future.
I personally love Thailand and Udon in particular. Would I change things if I could? hell yes.....but the only major change would be a stronger Farang economy and the Baht to weaken.
Onwards and Upwards Guys and lets not get sucked into the negativity surrounded by lazy and ill-informed journalism directed at us ExPats.
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Re: Imported Husbands

Postby UdonExpat » September 26, 2010, 5:34 pm

Here's a video that goes along with the original story.

http://video.nytimes.com/video/2010/09/ ... ience.html

This is certainly light weight journalism, but it's not pretending to be anything more. Factual? I don't know, and am not particlarly concerned about it. Perhaps this will draw hundreds of new marriage proposals, but I doubt it. It's just nice to see Udon getting international coverage.
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Re: Imported Husbands

Postby trubrit » September 26, 2010, 7:23 pm

Okay having seen the sponsored version I now understand why having a rounders net in the garden was given so much prominence . :roll: I would just like to give some of my feelings and thoughts on this subject . maybe the mods might condsider it needs a new topic , but to me it follows on naturally .I have in the past, as some may know, contributed to these type of reports, what I call honey and roses presentations . They have appeared on both Thai and international TV. My main purpose in appearing was to show the other side of the story which mainly showed us , the farang, as an old , beer drinking, womanising man, using our money to abuse the young impoverished girls , for our sexual and other selfish desires .The girls for their part, as money grabbing , heartless bitches, who really had no interest in the old farangs welfare outside of his monetry contribution . I agreed, with my wife , to appear in the story, to show that there was another side. That it was indeed possible to have a mutually beneficial partnership that would bring both happiness and indeed , love to the relationship . At the same time showing that all farang are not just womanising drunkards, neither are all Thai ladies the scheming money grabbing bitches they are often portrayed as .However I feel the story has moved on from there, so when I was recently approached by a high level delegation and a foreign media TV team to take part in another honey and roses presentation, I agreed to take part if the emphasise was moved from the benefits to the cause. I suggested the programme should include why the younger Thai woman should feel it neccessary to sell her soul and her body to a much older farang and indeed why, when the said farang has made the commitment, both financially and emotionally, he should be subjected to so much humilitation by the Thai government, just to stay here and support her family. Having to go through the embarrassing immigration proceedures every year, when all he wants is to live a peaceful happy life with his new family .Needless to say they didn't agree, saying it was too sensitive to discuss and went to find another more cooperative farang couple . :lol:
ijuts rule!
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Re: Imported Husbands

Postby monkeyman » September 26, 2010, 7:24 pm

I know falaangs get bored here, but have my bloody neighbors got nothing else better to do! :shock:

Missus & kids wants me to go out and buy a hoop now! :roll:
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Re: Imported Husbands

Postby LoongLee » September 27, 2010, 4:33 am

Parrot,
"I was in the Air Force when .................................."

=D> =D> =D>

Same here, except we've just celebrated 40 years,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, Ha, Ha

Remember what Granny said Parrot,,,,,,, " Don't let the bastards get you down"

Cheers,,,, LL
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Re: Imported Husbands

Postby rct » September 27, 2010, 5:23 pm

Let's hear comments regarding the 5 minute video link with this article.

Accurate portrayal of average farang/Thai couples in the region?
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Re: Imported Husbands

Postby parrot » September 27, 2010, 7:07 pm

I watched the video.....didn't see anything that was out of whack. I've known a Brit raising pigs, a guy from New Mexico raising cows, a Brit growing rice, an American living in the bush sans electricity, an Italian eating only Italian food, another Italian working 7 days a week selling water....all happily married to country bumpkins....all living a variety of lifestyles.
Likewise, I'm sure it'd be easy enough to tape 5 minutes of video of the bar scene in Udon that would give a completely different impression.
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