Newbie

Post by **Giggle** » May 9, 2018, 1:46 pm

You misspelled philistines. And yes, quite likely.

Post by **SJP17** » May 9, 2018, 1:59 pm

Keep yourself busy with work projects or hobbies and try not to drink too much , I think a big problem here with expats is that boredom eventually leads to them drinking too much alcohol.

I wish you well with your move

Post by **Fatone** » May 9, 2018, 2:06 pm

https://www.youtube.com/user/notime2bsad/videos

Watch a few of this guys videos for a positive slant on Thai expat life

Post by **stattointhailand** » May 9, 2018, 2:41 pm

I can identify with many of makkas comments. It's not a case of whinging its a case of being able and prepared to adjust to things that you had not expected.

My friends in Uk use to say it must be absolute heaven to be able to play golf 2 or 3 times a week with a caddy for less than it cost for one round back home ............ yes it was heaven most of the time, but even with a caddy walking 8 - 10 km in 40+ degrees with little shade can be hard (especially if your not having a good round).

Many many things that you only realise when you experience them. It's up to the individual to make the best of what you have and to find ways to accept and enjoy the unexpected bits that crop up along the way.

Post by **Big boss** » May 9, 2018, 4:30 pm

Hi mate...
You will find Udon Thani a nice place to live.
And find everything you need to live Big supermarkets
DIY stores ,hospital good eating in and around Udon ..
Airport with flights to Chiang Mai ,Phuket Bangkok
Etc....
Some nice bars and good people in them too easy to make
Friends if you want ..
Night markets and smell of FRESH fish food lovely fruit,
Cakes everything you could wish for cold beer, Ok sometimes not so cold lol
Business your plans not sure ...
Only reason am saying this because not know about your import business and not my business but good luck anyway
I see many people have put there views to you that's what they think and trying to be helpful ..
You have to live there and fine out for yourself
Good side and the bad side of Udon Thai !!
But like anyway In the world always good and bad let's hope good !!!!!and enjoy your retirement ...
And maybe one day our paths will cross for a cold beer with our ladies wife and friends and we can see what you think of Udon Thani...
Anyway all the best for the future Big boss ....

Post by **Laan Yaa Mo** » May 9, 2018, 6:05 pm

Fatone wrote: ↑
May 9, 2018, 1:09 pm
Yes, OK, I am not in LOS yet, soon to come to live,but this thread is enough to make me wonder about that decision. Maybe philapines?

I think you mean, the Philippines

Post by **glalt** » May 9, 2018, 6:58 pm

Actually it's pretty simple. As far as taking advice, It is different strokes for different folks. What works for one will be entirely wrong for the next guy. The main rule is to never spend more than you can afford to walk away from. The biggest mistake than an expat can make is to get trapped in a situation that they can't escape from. Always have a logical plan "B". Remember that you cannot own land in Thailand. If you buy a house, it will belong to your wife, not you.

Post by **stattointhailand** » May 9, 2018, 7:00 pm

Laan Yaa Mo wrote: ↑
May 9, 2018, 6:05 pm

Fatone wrote: ↑
May 9, 2018, 1:09 pm
Yes, OK, I am not in LOS yet, soon to come to live,but this thread is enough to make me wonder about that decision. Maybe philapines?
I think you mean, the Philippines

or may be he should just stay where he is for the next year or so ............ if a few comments on a forum can change your mind I suspect that he is a few weeks/months/years short on the research needed before making a decision like this

Post by **maaka** » May 10, 2018, 7:44 am

Second that Glalt.
Indeed, I have known many a man come back with their Thai wives, who they met overseas, where things were all honky dory, but no sooner had she got back home to her family circle, and culture, when their acquired western ways fell by the wayside, and then the relationship went down like the Titanic..

My missus was saying last night how everyone in Siam is money hungry, not realising that even she has become a little bit more demanding of late..its hard to keep her in check sometimes..alot of that pressure is coming from her workmates and peers. Why doesnt he buy you a truck, instead of a motorbike, why doesnt he do this, do that..when in reality we are probably one of the better off families in the hood.

One aspect that dents even my resolve, is when you approach locals like a beaming Donny Osmond, only to get the look, and treatment as if you were some sort of dirty trailer trash. That unwelcoming welcome takes some getting use too, if you are a neighbourly kind of person..I never felt unwelcome in my own country, but I guess like everywhere these days, immigrants are having a rough deal in their adopted countries

and no I am not a whinging pom Digger, just sharing some insights with you newbies.

Post by **semperfiguy** » May 10, 2018, 9:43 am

maaka wrote: ↑
May 10, 2018, 7:44 am
Second that Glalt.
Indeed, I have known many a man come back with their Thai wives, who they met overseas, where things were all honky dory, but no sooner had she got back home to her family circle, and culture, when their acquired western ways fell by the wayside, and then the relationship went down like the Titanic..

My missus was saying last night how everyone in Siam is money hungry, not realising that even she has become a little bit more demanding of late..its hard to keep her in check sometimes..alot of that pressure is coming from her workmates and peers. Why doesnt he buy you a truck, instead of a motorbike, why doesnt he do this, do that..when in reality we are probably one of the better off families in the hood.

One aspect that dents even my resolve, is when you approach locals like a beaming Donny Osmond, only to get the look, and treatment as if you were some sort of dirty trailer trash. That unwelcoming welcome takes some getting use too, if you are a neighbourly kind of person..I never felt unwelcome in my own country, but I guess like everywhere these days, immigrants are having a rough deal in their adopted countries

and no I am not a whinging pom Digger, just sharing some insights with you newbies.

I have to totally agree with you Maaka. I traveled the world on business for many years during my career, and without doubt I have never experienced the kind of unfriendliness and downright prejudice that I feel here from the Thais. I learned years ago that if one wants to make friends, then show yourself friendly. I do that with everyone whose path I cross during my days, and after 8 years I have yet to make a single Thai friend or have more than a very shallow conversation even with English speaking locals. I never understood why until I heard about the 3 circles pertaining to relationships in Thailand. The first is close and extended family members, the second is friends, colleagues and those in authority over a person and the third is everyone else. If one fits into the third circle then he/she is for the most part simply "invisible" and just doesn't matter. I can't count the number of times that people have actually ridden their bicycles straight into me or walked all over me while I have attempted to navigate through the streets in my village during my evening walk, not to mention the multitude of times that other pedestrians on sidewalks or in the malls have practically knocked me down in their quest to gain the upper hand in a "right of way" battle as if I were literally "invisible" to them. Foreigners are figuratively and literally invisible to the Thais and we just don't really matter to them! The sooner we face up to that reality and stop fooling ourselves, the easier it will be to carve out a bearable nook for oneself in this little corner of the world. Living like this day after day after day in such isolation is simply not healthy, and every expat that I know is similarly frustrated. Some say they have managed to accept the way things are here, some see the society through rose colored glasses and believe the Thais can doing nothing wrong while others live depressed within the virtual prison of their minds.

I could write a book here to encourage people to stay clear of Thailand if they want to keep their sanity, but each prospective "newbie" is hell bent on experiencing this life for themselves to their own detriment because they refuse to listen to the advice of those that have gone before them, so why bother. We're all looking for that magical experience that will bring peace and happiness to our lives, so good on you if you find it here. I say the odds are against you and if there's any one thing that you should take away from this post, just remember that Murphy's Law is not only alive and well in Thailand....but it abounds. "IF ANTHING CAN GO WRONG....IT WILL"!

Please don't shout me down for my opinions. We all have our experiences to report and I am simply being honest with mine. If I had my druthers I'd be living in the Philippines. I lived there full time from 1978 to 1988, and for me that was my magical experience of a lifetime. However, for now I have made my bed in Thailand, and as my dear mother used to say..."now you have to sleep in it"!

Post by **the-monk** » May 10, 2018, 11:07 am

Thanks to ALL for sharing your REAL LIFE experiences, it has been the most enlightening, interesting. useful topics in a long time. Bravo.... Keep them coming... Have a nice day.

Post by **rick** » May 10, 2018, 12:59 pm

Been living here for 8 years, no major problems. Married just before moving here.

I did research a lot before coming, and found that very useful. Had also lived and worked in a few foreign countries during my life, so no culture shock from coming here. Have a good family, and realised i was marrying the family, not just the wife.

What didn't work out as expected? Spent about 50% more than i budgeted for, just couldn't get the family to plan expenditure and budget. Exchange rate effects - I was prepared for some, but only went down ever since getting here! Due to the climate, and poor quality, many things deteriorate rapidly and need to be replaced (e.g. plastic garden chairs, which in the UK lasted over 20 years, disintegrate after two). I have never really adapted to the high temperatures, spend more time inside than i would like. Tried a few money making hobbies (growing vegetables, fish) but never really made anything. Miss have a public library of English books.

Social. I have not made any Thai friends outside family, but didn't really try. Unlike Semperfiguy, have not noticed any hostility or rudeness from Thais, but maybe that is because i treat everyone as equals (even if they are at the bottom of the Thai 'face' stakes.

Would i do it all over again, if i could backtrack 10 years? Yes, But with hindsight, probably have done a few things differently, you live and learn.

Post by **pf-flyer** » May 10, 2018, 1:38 pm

[quote=maaka post_id=512885 time=1525913054 user_id=8937]
Second that Glalt.
Indeed, I have known many a man come back with their Thai wives, who they met overseas, where things were all honky dory, but no sooner had she got back home to her family circle, and culture, when their acquired western ways fell by the wayside, and then the relationship went down like the Titanic..

I agree 100%... My wife and I lived happily with each other in the U.S. for 40 years...The first year in Thailand was a quantum leap for us. The local experts ran ruff shod all over us. They took no consideration for our values and who we were. My wife was peer pressured to be accommodating and compliant with their priority's and their agenda. My wife of 40 years and I found ourselves shortly after we moved to Thailand having frequent serious disagreements and arguments and asking ourselves how much longer will our marriage last. I was frequently overruled or just ignored or told to go and set down over there and we will take care of everything by the local experts making face for themselves that considered me just another stupid farang. It is the same the ruff shod attitude that you see when your are out driving on the highway.

I will second the endorsement of the You Tube site that was previously mentioned.
Chuck Honeycut's notime2bsad YouTube Channel has helped me a lot just to watch something positive about living in Thailand.

Post by **glalt** » May 10, 2018, 3:04 pm

My Thai wife has been putting up with me for about 12 years. We had been living in MY Jomtien condo for the first year or so. I say my condo because I bought it before we were married and it is in my name. She finally talked me into giving life up country a try. We have been living up here for more than 10 years. The very first thing she had to understand was that her house was for the two of us. The first of her family members that moved in with us would mean that I would be headed back to my condo and she could do whatever she wanted. Her family knows that I am a crotchety old fart and that I like my privacy. I don't remember the last time one of her family even came in the house, They sit out on the porch whenever they visit. My wife is free to visit her family whenever she wants, at their homes.

Post by **pf-flyer** » May 11, 2018, 7:33 am

pf-flyer wrote: ↑
May 10, 2018, 1:38 pm

maaka wrote: ↑
May 10, 2018, 7:44 am
Second that Glalt.
Indeed, I have known many a man come back with their Thai wives, who they met overseas, where things were all honky dory, but no sooner had she got back home to her family circle, and culture, when their acquired western ways fell by the wayside, and then the relationship went down like the Titanic..

I agree 100%... My wife and I lived happily with each other in the U.S. for 40 years...The first year in Thailand was a quantum leap for us. The local experts ran ruff shod all over us. They took no consideration for our values and who we were. My wife was peer pressured to be accommodating and compliant with their priority's and their agenda. My wife of 40 years and I found ourselves shortly after we moved to Thailand having frequent serious disagreements and arguments and asking ourselves how much longer will our marriage last. I was frequently overruled or just ignored or told to go and set down over there and we will take care of everything by the local experts making face for themselves that considered me just another stupid farang. It is the same the ruff shod attitude that you see when your are out driving on the highway.

I will second the endorsement of the You Tube site that was previously mentioned.
Chuck Honeycut's notime2bsad YouTube Channel has helped me a lot just to watch something positive about living in Thailand.

This is for the OP. My previous reply may come off as being a bitter expat living with a heavy load of regrets. There will be regrets in your life no matter where you live. Dwelling on Regrets can poison your thoughts and eventually your attitude and you end up being a bitter person that nobody wants to be around. Before I retired we made plans and dreamed of retiring in Thailand. My wife and my thoughts were occupied with dreams and thoughts of retiring in Thailand with my wife. I can only speak for myself. For me it is dealing with my expectations and the processing the reality of life in Thailand in my heart. Happiness is an issue within the heart. There are times that we need to vent. There are times when my wife and I vent together. I get a chuckle when my wife is venting and she will say “What is wrong with these people”. I love my Thai wife more than anything in this world. She takes very good care of me. It is relationships that are important in life and not possessions. I do not miss the rat race back in the U.S. and pressure to i go into debt in order to buy stuff that we really do not need in order to impress people that we do not like. I have a note for the trolls out there. My wife’s family has been good to us and I have a good relationship with them.

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