Danger Signs

Long distance relationships, mixed relationships etc...
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yorkman
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Post by yorkman » February 20, 2006, 2:33 am

Does this make any sense to anybody?

Slightly perturbed perhaps.....or the wrong forum



farang
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Post by farang » February 20, 2006, 3:25 am

wrong planet john lol

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FrazeeDK
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Skin hues and commercially driven standards of beauty

Post by FrazeeDK » February 20, 2006, 3:25 am

I would reckon that the original Thai perception that light skin is beautiful probably did come from the rich folk not having to work in the fields. I'd say that even today that may be a part of it.. However, I'd put forth that today the prime driver behind the whole beauty=white skin is commercially driven.. You can't watch Thai TV for five minutes without encountering yet another "Beauty whitening lotion".. This crass commercialism even shows commercials with the darker skinned girl shunned by the handsome guy yet "yes" after 4-5 days of "Beauty Whitening Treatments" the lad sees her again, and is thunderstruck with that glowin' white skin.. Amazing how consumerism drives society..!!
In talking with younger Thai and Lao girls (relatives and friends) they've all totally bought into the whole idea.. They don't want sun-block, they want skin bleach.. Of course, those in the lower economic strata that get snagged by the beauty products sold in the cheapie mall booths and out of "Super's" in the villages end up with an unhealthful bleach that can damage their skin.. Put on the cream, skin gets white and damaged and prone to more damage if exposed to any sun..
Have you ever noted those young gals with an acne-scarred countenance with ghost white skin?? Even with the scarring they believe they are the penultimate beauties due to the pasty countenance..
Of course, the end-all are those girls you see down in the Bangkok top-end malls with spaghetti-strap tops, and shorts who have obviously bathed in some type of skin-bleaching liquid..
It all is of course, a shame.. Most country girls that don't use this crap on their faces have a clear beautiful tanned complexion.. But, the times do move forward and the abilitiy of Thai advertising to drive buying is truly astonishing..
A flip side would be to wonder when the skin hue perceptions will change.. I've talked to numerous folks out of Japan and they state the new "trendy" thing is for all the younger girls to be tanned and not Kabuki theatre white. I wonder if the trend will ever come to SE Asia??
Dave

yorkman
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Post by yorkman » February 20, 2006, 3:35 am

Ok......

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BobHelm
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Post by BobHelm » February 20, 2006, 3:55 am

Interesting points raised there Dave. it was one of the first things I noticed when I came to thailand as well..mind you I lived in West Africa for a while in the 80's and it was exactly the same there - coming from England I had never seen a 'whitening' product in my life & didn't know they existed until then...

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Galee
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Post by Galee » February 20, 2006, 5:23 am

I blame Michael Jackson. :lol: :lol: :lol:

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Post by Buom Pouy » February 20, 2006, 2:19 pm

LW sold some of those whiting cream products at her shop/stall in Vientiane all the ingredients were written in English good for someone like me who can read them Bad for the Lao folks pasted that nasty S**t on three or four times a day. Now our niece is has an incurable rash similar in colour to an chemical burn a dark purplely blue it covers most of her back and a portion of her face. Totally destroyed her self-esteem and reacts very badly with certain foods. :censored: hell is all I can say about the companies that make the stuff.

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muscle
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Post by muscle » November 26, 2006, 8:37 pm

Buom Pouy wrote:LW sold some of those whiting cream products at her shop/stall in Vientiane all the ingredients were written in English good for someone like me who can read them Bad for the Lao folks pasted that nasty S**t on three or four times a day. Now our niece is has an incurable rash similar in colour to an chemical burn a dark purplely blue it covers most of her back and a portion of her face. Totally destroyed her self-esteem and reacts very badly with certain foods. :censored: hell is all I can say about the companies that make the stuff.
Mercury was and still is used in some of the products. Very toxic. My wife and her friends are ga-ga about some stuff a woman in Chomanny Neua whips up in her kitchen. As an RN, I am highly leary and am looking for a lab to run a test.

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BKKSTAN
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Post by BKKSTAN » December 6, 2006, 4:58 pm

:lol: Old thread that I had never read before!Very interesting and I agree with all the danger signs listed,BUT they are and should be taken as that and not as facts!
Speaking good conversational English could mean that this gal was once married to a falang.There is a decent possibility that if they divorced,he might have been the culprit.The other thing that comes to mind is ,what if she was an excellent wife and her husband died!
If I was to die,it would be a very very lucky man that got the interest of my wife! :)

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Re: Danger Signs

Post by yorkman » December 9, 2006, 4:32 am

valentine wrote: I personally have no knowledge of bar girls
A slight lie as a topic starter..but then.......

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Post by yorkman » December 9, 2006, 4:51 am

valentine wrote:If I was in the market, thats bang on. plus me personally would require, non smoker, no tatoos and no kids.
"market"??? ohhh different worlds. I love my wife, a teacher in Udon, not everybodys sexual fantasy, but grow up people.. at last... and it is reciprocated. I don't "require" any more. If she had kids (which she did not), so be it.... a different perception of the real world perhaps??

valentine

Re: Danger Signs

Post by valentine » December 9, 2006, 7:36 am

yorkman wrote:
valentine wrote: I personally have no knowledge of bar girls
A slight lie as a topic starter..but then.......
Welcome back 'again' yorkman. Do you go into hibernation every summer?Not a very promising start with your first few posts. You certainly won't lose your title of, and here I quote anothers description, "Tolerated Idiot" unless you use your "Higher"education to better effect.Keep trying, but don't get too personal. I'm getting a bit touchy in my advancing years. :wink:

yorkman
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Re: Danger Signs

Post by yorkman » December 17, 2006, 3:05 am

valentine wrote: us old hands
LOL... maybe us (not me) "old hands" at whoremongering..

Thank goodness you grew up at the end of your life Val.

Thai women are people, just like you and me; you have found one that surprisingly cares for you.... don't lose it...

yorkman
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Re: Danger Signs

Post by yorkman » December 17, 2006, 3:13 am

valentine wrote:
yorkman wrote:
valentine wrote: I personally have no knowledge of bar girls
A slight lie as a topic starter..but then.......
I'm getting a bit touchy in my advancing years. :wink:
You certainly are.... and here are the "differences". LOL no problems Val, we all have our experiences in Thailand good and bad. Thank god or buddha mine are 95% good and I can be permanently fixed in Udon soon.

Want to go flying??


John

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izzix
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Post by izzix » December 31, 2006, 4:39 pm

can you be certain about any signs ? just heard from my buddy whos NongKhai wife scarpered with a French bloke that his mate who married an Udon gal has just got divorced and he had to pay her 45,000 pounds to get out. She did move out but now she has come back and he cant get rid of her .
he met her thru a dating agency and she had never done any FL or bar work.
she is not a good looker as he didnt want a gal who would be getting hit on but she has turned out to be a nuisance all the same.

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charlie
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Post by charlie » January 2, 2007, 5:37 pm

Hi everyone.
I am what I see you call a "newbie" and I have just spent the last few hours reading this forum with increasing horror.
I met my girlfriend in a bar in Pattaya. I was there last year on a holiday paid for by my business colleagues, as I was going through a messy divorce in the UK and they wanted to cheer me up
I met her on the first night and had a fantastic 2 weeks. However I noticed that every day she would phone her daughter back home and would always look sad after.
Towards the end of the holiday I could not bear the thought of her going back to work at the bar and asked her how much it would cost to keep her back at home. She told me 7000 baht a month and I was happy to agree to that.
For the next 5 months we talked,emailed and text and finally I returned to Thailand (Nong Khai) for a 2 week visit. I had a fantastic time and although initially stayed in a hotel, moved out to the family house in a small village. I felt thoroughly at home with the people in the village, the family were extremely friendly and although I obviously was obliged to pay for the parties! did not feel that I was being taken advantage of.
The holiday passed too quickly and I left with a heavy heart.
After a week back home and the thought of another awful british xmas, I jumped on a plane and returned to the village without any warning to my girlfriend. The look on her face was priceless! I do not think even my mother would look so happy to see me!!
So I decided there and then that I could not live without her and asked her to marry me.
I do not care about her past. All i care about is the future.
But your forum seems to give nothing but negative views about ex bargirls. Surely there must be some positive stories? or am I being completely stupid believing that it does not matter where you find your soulmate? We have all done things we are not proud of in our lives.
I am 45, my girlfriend is 35, with a daughter of 5 years from a thai boyfriend who left when she got pregnant.
My plan now is to work in europe for 2 months then return to thailand for 3 weeks. I want to buy some land in the village and have a house built.
I would welcome any suggestions, comments from anybody out there!

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banpaeng
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Post by banpaeng » January 2, 2007, 5:56 pm

First to answer your question. Yes I know of several bar girls who married and made fine wives. I think I have said that before. All anyone is really saying is go a bit slow. I am not saying you are rushing only take things slow and easy to avoid heartache on either side. There is one thing a lot of the guys on here forget: Bargirls are human to. Some are qute jaded and some are just plain good ole girls. Does that sound like all women worldwide. Also remember, you met her in a bar, so no double standard, that makes you a bar man. :lol:

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Paul
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Post by Paul » January 2, 2007, 6:15 pm

Of course anybody who works in a bar is a prostitute - or some would have you believe.

I know of many many girls who work in bars who simply refuse to go out with Farang (or Thai)customers and they work in a bar just as anyone else works in an office or restaurant.

Of those I have met who do go with customers I have never, absolutely never met anyone who is doing it for their own personal gain. They are supporting either their own children or their parents.

If you were a Thai girl and had absolutely no money to feed your kids or help your parents - and the lure of tens of thousands of baht a month was there - would you (could you) resist?

Hypothetical I know unless you are actually placed in that situation, so the answers will never be honest.

Suffice to say that who are we to judge and as banpaeng has said - they are still human beings with feelings like the rest of us.

So to the guy above who is head over heels in love - concentrate on the future not the past and continue to make this girls dream come true. Good Luck.

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Prenders88
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Post by Prenders88 » January 2, 2007, 6:44 pm

Great story Charlie.

Best Wishes for both of you.

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arjay
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Post by arjay » January 2, 2007, 7:33 pm

Charlie, Just go very, very slowly. Don't rush into anything. And don't commit anything that you're not prepared to lose, if things don't work out (in the longer term).

Good Luck.

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