Goodbye Thailand.... I am GONE !!

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Post by Bump » May 6, 2007, 1:18 pm

You kno maybe what it reallybreaks doen to is this is not for everybody. I would think if you have really close ties to your homeland. You would be torn between the two constantly. I didn't have that so I toughed it out to make thing better for myself here.

My home and family is here. There is a family in the states. But I'm very proud to say they are busy living thier own lives, I think that was the goal in the first place. I'm glad they achieved that.



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Post by arjay » May 6, 2007, 2:00 pm

I'd missed the earlier part of this thread when my Pc was down and have only just read the whole thread. I must say it is interesting and the Stickman post, posted by BKKStan very valid. :D

I must agree that every place has it's pluses and minuses, and we (particulalry me) are often too quick to focus on the minuses. I too have found a return visit to the Uk helps adjust my thinking. :shock:

The things that tend to get me down here are often the small, relatively trivial things, like over-charging.

Val has a point, in that often one's ideal often exists in one's head, and is maybe there all the time, with the right mindset and a little re-appraisal. Also, there is some merit in the saying: Steak every day can get boring! ;)

Udonfarang, I too sensed that you aren't really sure of where you want to be. Maybe an extended trip or break may help in re-focussing your thoughts? :D

From what I have heard about the Philippines, I don't think that would be the right place, certainly not for me anyway. I've also briefly looked at Malaysia and din't take to there.

I would be interested to hear why Mainer is leaving, particularly as he mentioned the same point on a Relationships thread, which makes me wonder if it is related to disappointments with relationships here in LOS?

I've been here 7 years now, so I suppose a touch of the "7 year itch" is inevitable! :roll:

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Post by banpaeng » May 6, 2007, 2:40 pm

I think Ray hit it pretty good in saying, Thailand is not for everyone. As he has stated one must evaluate his own stage in life and figure out where the next stage will take them. As I have done that, 99 percent of the reason for leaving is within myself or wife and not on Thailand. I think most of us could make it if we choose however if one chooses not to stay, that does not make them bad.

When we left the states, we said we only had a 10 percent chance of staying due to family commitments and some of our hobbies. Did we give it a fair shake due to the above comment? I am not sure of that either. I know we are glad we did. We have met some good folks, Thai and Falang. Met some Thai and Falang, that I would no longer care to associate with but this is a very small minority.

If money was the only consideration, then leaving is one of the stupidest things I could do. There is more to life than money. It is a major concern but you need to factor in family, personal enjoyment and pleasures, hobbies and ones points of views.

I would never tell anyone not to come to Thailand and try it. I feel if you are single and come over you will be more sucessful. If you are comming with a Thai spouse who has lived outside of the country for a considerable amount of time, a lot of thinking needs to go into the process. The spouse will no longer be Thai but a Falang/Thai. REadapting is not that easy. Not to hard either but will not be like on holiday.

The above is opinions. If you agree so be it. If you disagree so be it. Have a good day.

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Post by Bump » May 6, 2007, 4:16 pm

Well I think you gave it fair shake got out the hoilday approach went into the real living, don't fit, well it don't fit. Better to find what does and enjoy the memories of the adventure.

Money would never keep me here either, nor would the avialiblity of the little sweeties, it just fits me. What my life has transpired to is really a very good balance for me. Never had that before and I'm enjoying it.

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Post by arjay » May 6, 2007, 4:16 pm

Banpaeng, sorry to hear that that you are leaving too, though from your comments I understand why. (I believe we met at one or more of Ray's bowling sessions.)

As I understand it you had already built a life for yourself and your Thai wife in the States, where you had both lived together for many years, and had left that behind coming to LOS to test the water. So as you say, you already have that "existing life" there waiting for you to pick up the threads, so to speak. :D

Good Luck, and remember Thailand will still be here whenever you want to visit. ;)

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Post by tudorandpim » May 6, 2007, 4:59 pm

If you are comming with a Thai spouse who has lived outside of the country for a considerable amount of time, a lot of thinking needs to go into the process. The spouse will no longer be Thai but a Falang/Thai
It always was my grand plan to retire to Thailand. Now, a few years down the road my dear spouse has made it crystal clear where she feels most at home. She feels like an alien in her own land. Largely because, family apart, she gets treated like one. Now even a holiday visit requires persuasion.
Experience has shown her judgement to be impeccable. So I'll go with that and keep an open mind. It's still 7 years to retirement and we have kids in school in UK. So that's two more preferences and aspirations to consider. The inevitability of change is the only certainty in life. So for now any thought of permanent relocation would require too great a leap of faith for me. Perhaps the ideal is to enjoy the best of both worlds and keep all options open. I like Arjay's notion that a return to the land of origin enables a re-focussing on what really is important. A chance to get your head on straight.
What's worse? Living with Gordon Brown's hand in my pocket, swiping 50% of all I have. Or having money weaseled out of me with bribes, overcharging and scams? One is chronic, makes me angry and gets me down. The other is more acute and makes me angry at the time, but then I laugh it off.
How valid is that figure of 2.5 years for the lifespan of an expat in LOS? Does that include all the 20-something 'English teachers' and travellers to Oz who got stuck on the way?

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Post by Bump » May 6, 2007, 5:10 pm

I think you better take another look, your describing something I haven't seen in the four+ years of living here I have never paid a bribe in Thailand, you can only be scammed if let yourself be scammed. I have never met anyone that is succesful in living here without setting limits on family members and many do.

2.5 years darn I better be careful I'm living on borrowed time :lol:

I know guys who have lived here well over 20 years and are doin just fine

Sorry but you really didn't paint a picture of Thailand that I have seen.

Most people leave for thier own reasons, usually becasue they believe they would happier somewhere else. I'm sure they are right for themselves.

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Post by Prenders88 » May 6, 2007, 6:36 pm

My grand plan is the same as Tudor's, retirement within the next year if all goes well.
I'd be much better off in Thailand even with the overcharging, which is not so bad now you have places like Tesco's/Global House that have killed off the family shops who used to take the piss, with the prices. Try getting a refund from Mr and Mrs Jeck. You can always vote with your feet. Much better to slip the constable a couple of hundred baht in your licence than to receive three points on your licence and whopping increase in your motor insurance. Tudor you forgot not only the 50% tax, but Gordon Brown stole your old age, by taxing premium bonus payments from our pension funds to the tune of ฃ8 billion a year. :(
Council Tax of ฃ1500 a year to live in a London Borough that is twinned with Lahore.
A crumbling National Health Service, which has to pick up the tab for thousands of immigrants who have not paid a penny into the system, but bleeding it dry.
ฃ200,000 for a tiny flat right next to a sink estate full of Chav scum.
A friend of mine has had to move from his ฃ600,000 house in Battersea, he got tired of his daughters getting attacked in the street on the way to school, and his car vandalised he and wife just had enough and threw in the towel. Decent hard working people chased out of London.

My wife has been in the UK or seven years and has hated every minute of it, she pines for Thailand and her Family. She can now see through all the smoke and mirrors that England is for the ordinary working man, all washed up. All fur coat and no knickers.
It's hard to have any quality of life in England, everything is so expensive.
What we take for granted in Thailand like eating out, or going to the cinema is expensive in England and poor value.
A coffee and cake will cost me ฃ5 in the rundown cafe in Hyde Park, a Steak lunch in a cafe next door to Nong Prajack Park with wall to wall eye candy walking by will cost a trim 120 baht. No contest.
It's little things in Thailand that don't cost anything that does it for me.
The street life, and street food
Watching the sunrise and sunsets from the roof of my shophouse.
The sexy girls in Global House. Compare them with the Old Farts in B&Q
Watching the football at the Night Market Beer Garden.
The best looking girls in the World, everywhere.
The climate
My health is much better
I can drive my big 3 litre pick up and not feel quilty
If I stay in England I think my lifespan would be reduced.
Thailand for me no contest.
Udon Thani, best seen through your car's rear view mirror.

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Post by arjay » May 6, 2007, 6:59 pm

Bribes are not an issue or a problem for me in Thailand either. :D

It's usually little things like over-charging, or manoevring on prices, and mostly in the Thai tourist places, that irritate me. Like the GF asks if she can have I think it was "Won Sen" with her Yam salad, and despite (at my insistence) asking how much that would be when ordering, and being told the same price as the menu - 80 baht, when the bill came it had jumped from 80 to 120 baht. :shock:

You always seem to have to ask the next question, otherwise the final bill is never what the Menu leads you to expect, though as I said that is in a very touristy area. And why should I pay 90 baht for fried rice in a restaurant that targets farang tourists, when down the road it's 30 baht??!! :shock:

That is all put into perspective though, when I visited the Uk 2 years ago and bought a filled baguette and a small bottle of water at Reading railway station. The bill was ฃ6.50 about 400 baht!! :shock:

Prenders, be aware, you can't altogether escape Gordon Brown's hand in your pocket living in LOS. He still manages to lift ฃ178 (about 12K baht) of my occupational pension in tax every month, on the basis it was earned in the UK as well as paid in the UK. [-X
Last edited by arjay on May 6, 2007, 7:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Post by rickfarang » May 6, 2007, 7:02 pm

Going between Thailand and the West- same head, different wall.

Udon farang - I have to say that I can relate to your frustrations, but I think you will find pretty much the same things in varying degrees in most Asian countries, Singapore excepted.

If you haven't already, how about posting the things you want to sell in the classified section?

Good luck wherever you go, and when you do go, please remember to write and let us know how you are doing. And you too, banpaeng.

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Post by Prenders88 » May 6, 2007, 7:10 pm

Arjay wrote.
"Prenders, be aware, you can't altogether escape Gordon Brown's hand in your pocket living in LOS. He still manages to lift ฃ178 (about 12K baht) of my occupational pension in tax every month, on the basis it was earned in the UK as well as paid in the UK. "

I'm aware of that, no there is no escaping death and taxes.
:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:
Udon Thani, best seen through your car's rear view mirror.

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Post by southern belle » May 7, 2007, 11:45 am

Someone asked, on this subject, to hear from those of us who are leaving Thailand.
First of all, we came to Thailand ten years ago. Also traveled the world looking for a safe, friendly, cheap place to retire. Like alot of others, found it here in Thailand. So, we returned 2 1/2 years ago. Where we come from, in the U.S., prices are now the same ,or even cheaper than here. Also, our situation is somewhat different than most, being I am an not a Thai woman. We will miss all of the many friends we have made here, but, will return about once a year for medical care (we have BUPA) and to visit. Always felt safe here, lucky enough to have sold our house, ect. Another issue, as was mentioned before, is family. We have 5 children and 11 grandchildren. After the death of my husbands father this last month, which he could not get a quick flight out to be there, and now my daughters possible illness, will feel we are just too far away. We will always love Thailand and it's people. Sure theres the usual "get ripped off", but, that can happen anywhere you go or live in the world. I have made many Thai women friends and my husband has learned to speak some Thai/Loa. We will miss our river view, the smiles and simplicity of these people. But, we cannot do business here, which my husband has decided he wants to pursue again, and in a family crisis, it's just too far. I admit, it has not been easy for me to adjust, After all, if you look at the big picture, most men have younger Thai wives, and I am 50+ just who I am, but happy about it, never the less. Will keep monitoring this forum, after we leave, and wish everyone all the best!

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Post by LoveDaBlues » May 7, 2007, 12:33 pm

I've been in Udon Thani now for almost 2 years. Have never been ripped off in any restaurant. The wife and I eat out a lot and I'm always looking for a new place to eat. Just tried Nong's ribs; I'll be back.

I suspect most of the rip-off's are happening in tourist areas. That's why it's important to state WHERE the rip-off happened.

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Post by BKKSTAN » May 7, 2007, 1:21 pm

southern belle wrote:Someone asked, on this subject, to hear from those of us who are leaving Thailand.
First of all, we came to Thailand ten years ago. Also traveled the world looking for a safe, friendly, cheap place to retire. Like alot of others, found it here in Thailand. So, we returned 2 1/2 years ago. Where we come from, in the U.S., prices are now the same ,or even cheaper than here. Also, our situation is somewhat different than most, being I am an not a Thai woman. We will miss all of the many friends we have made here, but, will return about once a year for medical care (we have BUPA) and to visit. Always felt safe here, lucky enough to have sold our house, ect. Another issue, as was mentioned before, is family. We have 5 children and 11 grandchildren. After the death of my husbands father this last month, which he could not get a quick flight out to be there, and now my daughters possible illness, will feel we are just too far away. We will always love Thailand and it's people. Sure theres the usual "get ripped off", but, that can happen anywhere you go or live in the world. I have made many Thai women friends and my husband has learned to speak some Thai/Loa. We will miss our river view, the smiles and simplicity of these people. But, we cannot do business here, which my husband has decided he wants to pursue again, and in a family crisis, it's just too far. I admit, it has not been easy for me to adjust, After all, if you look at the big picture, most men have younger Thai wives, and I am 50+ just who I am, but happy about it, never the less. Will keep monitoring this forum, after we leave, and wish everyone all the best!
Sorry,I didn't get to meet you while you were here!I happy that you were able to sell your house,river front property is the best for resale in this area.Happy trails!

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Post by Bump » May 7, 2007, 2:38 pm

Well Thailand will miss you all, but the common thing seems to be distance from loved ones. Maybe the answer will lie in someplace closer if you enjoy other aspects of living out of your native country. For Americans perhaps something in Mexico or South America. Personally I woudl have a very difficult time adjusting to the states now. I enjoy much more freedom here, then I had there.

My time is my time here, something I really never had before. available other places closer to the states I'm sure it is.

A freind recently moved to a non tourist area of Mexico, and within a days drive of the states. The Visa aspect is much easier. I think a bit more expensive then here. The goods from the states are readily avialable since it is so close.

Buisness or work up to you, if that urge ever comes to be closer to my home country I might take a serious look at it. Anyway good luck to you all.

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Post by MuayThaiguy » June 4, 2007, 12:20 am

arjay, you pay whats on the menu. if you are paying more then you are letting yourself be ripped off. if you cant see a price always ask first, otherwise you pay what is written down.

nice ass in the photo!

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Post by Sirkusartist » July 18, 2007, 1:53 am

Went back to farangland recentlly only for a week. It was painful to see what it has become, was bad enough when i left...

It's better here, but as said, what are you looking for?
The basis for a good life here for a westerner is this:

More Money & Better Knowlege

If you don't have at least one of these advantages then you should probably look for some other place.

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Post by BKKSTAN » July 18, 2007, 8:36 am

Sirkusartist wrote:Went back to farangland recentlly only for a week. It was painful to see what it has become, was bad enough when i left...

It's better here, but as said, what are you looking for?
The basis for a good life here for a westerner is this:

More Money & Better Knowlege

If you don't have at least one of these advantages then you should probably look for some other place.
Better knowledge of what???

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Post by Sirkusartist » August 16, 2007, 3:52 am

Better knowledge of what???
I was going to make some nasty examples of this but there is really no point in making fun of isaan country people's lack of education, so i'll let it be. Country people in Isaan are hopelessly uneducated. It would be difficult to keep any 10 year old boy from Europe from laughing if he'd hear a 40-year old woman, half-educated, talking about biology, ghosts, or even agriculture! This is the sad truth.

As I am living here and enjoying, I appreciate the fact that Thailand is coming from developing country to industrial country, which is nice....

Hopefully, later, thai children can have a proper, free education.

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Post by panick » August 16, 2007, 5:18 am

I'll go with Stan on this one

Better knowledge of what?......

Your 2nd from last post says that the basis for a good life here as a Farang is More Money...(well that works in every country) and Better knowledge......

Your last post just seems to imply that you already have this Better knowledge as all Issan people are uneducated and a laughing stock to a 10yr old Western educated boy :shock:

So..... this Better knowledge you seek..... is to be more educated and higher standing than the average Thai person?

OR

Is it so that so that you can learn to understand the beliefs and culture of the Thailand people?

This culture tends to run on respect more than education, yes I am lot higher educated than my wife or any of her family.....Do I look down on them and laugh?...NO...70% of her family are older than me so I always show great respect them reguardless of their education...the other 30% show respect to me being younger than myself 8)

This is Thailand......its a different world....please don't Westernise it :(

So ....Better knowledge of what? :-k

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