Consolidated Joke Thread

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Laan Yaa Mo
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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by Laan Yaa Mo » December 22, 2023, 2:53 pm

That's a good one. 555+


You only pass through this life once, you don't come back for an encore.

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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by tamada » December 29, 2023, 9:07 pm

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Three Wise Men
'Don't waste your words on people who deserve your silence'
~Reinhold Messner~

'You don't have to be afraid of everything you don't understand'
~Louise Perica~

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Irish Alan
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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by Irish Alan » December 30, 2023, 6:50 am

Image

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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by jackspratt » February 1, 2024, 9:12 am

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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by Whistler » February 12, 2024, 10:21 pm

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I had a bumper sticker in Texas that read 'Beam me up Scotty'. I often wish I could find one in Udon Thani

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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by Laan Yaa Mo » February 13, 2024, 12:01 pm

You only pass through this life once, you don't come back for an encore.

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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by pipadoo » February 13, 2024, 4:30 pm

Precisely
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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by Whistler » February 15, 2024, 12:23 am

I was planning on getting married to my ex wife, but now she says no, I'm only marrying her for my money.
I had a bumper sticker in Texas that read 'Beam me up Scotty'. I often wish I could find one in Udon Thani

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Laan Yaa Mo
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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by Laan Yaa Mo » February 17, 2024, 10:06 am

Taking on the woke folk!

You only pass through this life once, you don't come back for an encore.

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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by Whistler » February 21, 2024, 5:32 pm

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I had a bumper sticker in Texas that read 'Beam me up Scotty'. I often wish I could find one in Udon Thani

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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by pipadoo » February 22, 2024, 3:11 pm

Obviously
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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by tinpeeba » February 22, 2024, 3:22 pm

It is a five minute walk from my house to the bar, but a 45 minute walk from the bar to my house.
The difference is staggering.

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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by trekkertony » February 22, 2024, 3:41 pm

I love the double entrende.

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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by tinpeeba » February 23, 2024, 3:09 pm

My wife rang me at the pub and said, "If you're not home in 10 minutes, I'm giving the dinner I cooked you to the dog."
I was home in 5 minutes.
l'd hate for anything to happen to the dog.

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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by tinpeeba » February 24, 2024, 3:32 pm

Scientists have successfully grown human vocal cords from stem cells in the lab.
The results speak for themselves.

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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by Laan Yaa Mo » February 26, 2024, 1:42 pm

A tourist is not impressed with Toronto:

You only pass through this life once, you don't come back for an encore.

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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by pipadoo » February 27, 2024, 4:19 pm

All you lucky married men out there
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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by tinpeeba » April 7, 2024, 1:56 pm

My friend was bragging about his new hearing aid. "State of the Art," he said,
"It cost me a fortune."
I asked: "Awesome what type is it?
"He said: "Two thirty."

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Re: Consolidated Joke Thread

Post by tinpeeba » April 22, 2024, 7:26 pm

My ex-girlfriend just told me she wants us to get back together again.
I sure am LUCKY!
I mean, first I win the lottery and now THIS!

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